Why I’m openly disabled on the internet

Writing a book about my disability has made me fully appreciate how far I have come. For starters, it wasn’t too long ago that I felt nothing but shame about my disability. I kept it quiet and refused accommodations and support because I thought that would make things better for everyone.

Ignoring my disability, though, goes down in my own personal history as the dumbest things I have done in my life. Even past experiences getting drunk at college parties, or things I’m ashamed to admit I did to impress guys I fancied when I was single seem small in comparison.

If your disability is visible and physical, you may not understand this sort of problem. So I guess I’ll elaborate just a little bit. Having an invisible, neurological disability has one side to it that’s a huge blessing and curse at the same time:

No one with an untrained eye can easily see me walk through a crowd and immediately assume I’m disabled. When I was hiding my disability from others the most, I got occasional comments like:

“You walk funny. Why is that?”

Prior to that, I had some level of suspicion that there was something ‘different’ about how I moved. I have a disorder (Dyspraxia) that affects how I coordinate my movements, after all. So I have to concentrate extremely hard every time…